2nd September. Triathlon. (Run Fat Boy Run)

During the swimming it's hard to tell what's happening, just an occasional glimpse of someone moving faster in an adjoining lane, possibly a female and wondering why they seem to have put an extra bucket of chlorine in the pool just for the event?

Then a woman gets past me on the return half of the 16k cycle route "Bugger it!"

Shit! I'm crap at the cycling.

The running came as a bit of a shock because the first half was unrelentingly uphill, you'd probably be as quick walking, in fact some of the more knackered ones did.

For some reason a lot of folk have a problem running downhill, whereas that really is something I can excel at, to the extent when I crossed the finishing line the bloke who had also come past me during the cycling had only just started eating an orange. "I'm not really built for running" he whined.

The woman that had got past was receiving first aid for a twisted ankle, tsk tsk...

Still if you were minded to it, these events could be a way to meet some very 'fit' women and in the process lose a considerable amount of weight either that or have a coronary, - not thinking of anyone in particular.

8 comments:

The Incredible Bulk said...

IF you were minded to it.



"What inspired you to win the Ironman for the 3rd year in succession, Mr Smith."

"I like fit birds with nice arses."

The Editor said...

As good a reason as any? speaking from a Darwinian perspective - perhaps the only real view is the rear view so to speak.

The Incredible Bulk said...

That's a far reaching comment, and beyond my personal timescale!

I believe the Darwinian model shows that human females developed breasts after we began walking upright, as a method to attract male attention from the front. I think it would have been much easier staying on all fours with the arse hang out. (Less talking.)

The PC crowd (and creationists) forget far too readily that humans are just monkeys that got lucky.

My personal ranking would be:

1) Intelligence
2) Arse
3) Posture (elegance)
4) Cooking ability
5) Humour
6) Security (rather lack of insecurity)
7) Face

All superceeded by frame size.

In the scheme of things, that puts me about here.

The Incredible Bulk said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Incredible Bulk said...

3rd time lucky

The Editor said...

The Orang is up against it these days on account of our insatiable desire for plywood, primarily for the wardrobe industry.

If the human female went about naked, Borneo might not be so denuded itself.

Clothing may become redundant anyway as Global temperatures continue to rise - it's an ill wind...

The Editor said...

Also with a CV like that I don't think Internet dating is that far fetched, perhaps... with a judicious use of photoshop?

The Incredible Bulk said...

I've seen your "Art of Cropping" and it nearly made me sick.