28th October. Blar Mor Bar Fallout.

"What's with the sandpaper George?" enquired Jimmy outside the B&B.

"I've heard that if you don't take the moulded bits off the tyres you're much more likely to fall off."

George had already gone for a spot of 'off-roading' the day before finding himself and new BMW in a field.

One of the main hazards besides wet roads, pine needles, and failing eyesight is riding with a blood alcohol level in excess of the legal maximum.

I noticed this morning when the alarm went off experiencing a greater than average difficulty working out if the clocks had gone forward or back and whether it was half past seven or half past nine.

"Well in 1969 when they didn't put the clocks back every child had to be issued with a flourescent armband because it was darker than it should be."

"So it should be lighter."

"Doh...?"

It's true that gin and tonic leaves you with less of a hangover but the grossly impaired judgement remains unchanged, I thought whilst overtaking a line of cars and feeling surprised to find several others coming the other way...