12th July. The Black Bull, Rothesay.

"I don't know about some of those birds in there though, they're just like eating machines with chins. They could demolish a steak in 2o seconds but I wouldn't want to shag it."

"Yes but some of them could have important jobs you haven't thought of that."

"Like what?"

"Well... like a casualty nurse."

"NO way they're fit for nothing, they couldn't even do secretarial work cause their fingers would hit more than one key."

"You mean they should be just melted down or something...Is that what you're saying?"

"Yeah made into soap. If your BMI is above a certain level you shouldn't be allowed to have children."

"Why, because its genetic?"

"No because sex between fat people is disgusting.."