16th April. An Inconvenient Truth.

Awoke unexpectedly in the night with an ominous sense of welling up-chuck, it was something progressive that wouldn't go away, an inconvenient truth like Al Gore's. I wanted to believe I could just go back to sleep and pretend it wasn't happening.

In the end It WAS happening, a sudden rise in sea level, I had to face facts and make my way to the bathroom...

The culprit in this case not gas-guzzling but nearly-out of-date lager-guzzling or was it the chocolate pie?

5 comments:

The Incredible Bulk said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Incredible Bulk said...

Echo the Snoring Man! After my near death experience of last weekend's over eating fest, I fully paced myself at the 1st BBQ event of the year. Unfortunately, it was either the sausages or the Tetanis Beer that caused a sleepless night of stomach wrenching. I have lost all faith in "Best Before Dates" now! We have confirmed that BBDs relate to optimal storage conditions (dry cool place, not wet warm place!).

I have the sound of "I've washed every can" ringing in my ear while I seek out a remedy for last week's disease of choice - Weils disease.

The Editor said...

As a point of information i once ate a yoghurt that was fully three months past its sell by date without ill effect, however it had been refrigerated.

Isabelle didn't report any illness but probably didn't drink much beer.

The beer was certainly outside but submerged during october/november surely cool enough? Then brought in to a cool place as an afterthought with the possibility of freezing conditions during december/january. Maybe it was that big brown label-less bottle of Hoegarten?

Re: the sausages I ate two last night and enjoyed an uninterrupted night.

I can only offer my sincere apologies to your digestive tract, this is a very serious matter possibly a crime?

The only remaining question is what to do with the rest of the beer? Distributing it amongst underage drinkers at the skate park could teach them a valuable lesson and pay a healthy dividend for the rest of society..

The Editor said...

In retrospect, if you cast your mind back, that Hoegarten did appear to have rather an excessive head when poured. The implication being that some additional fermentation may have taken place with a corresponding increase in by-products, at best unwarranted.

The Incredible Bulk said...

Very true - the "head" was around 30 times larger than the beer after the first pour. That should have set the alarm bells ringing.

So now you have a perfect secret weapon - overly fermented Hoegarten. It just takes a year to make.