23rd February. Random Restaurants Ltd.

"What did you order sir?" said the smallish Bangla Deshi man balancing various dishes.

"Number thirty-two."

"Mine's twenty-two." echoes Charlie.

"Yes but WHAT was your order sir?"

Why bother to get out your glasses and struggle with the dim lighting?

You see, my choices were limited to one, seventeen or thirty-two - applying the criteria of former addresses with numbers.

Number one would have been some kind of starter which left one of two surprises.

They should just keep the numbers and do away with everything else on the menu.

It's the new craze that's sweeping Britain!

Yes, It's Eating By Numbers!

10 comments:

The Incredible Bulk said...

I thought that was only a joke when we were at the Thai restaurant. Just as well you can't read without glasses, because you'd miss all those other tasty treats.

Is there a medical name for this particular restriction?

The Snoring Man said...

I often use the pinhole reading technique when at a restaurant without glasses.
Excellent for appearing deranged.

The Editor said...

You misunderstand - this is serendipity in action, go on surprise yourself.

In fact a roulette wheel or dice should be provided at both Chinese and Indian outlets.

Can be used in combination with eating in complete darkness.

The Incredible Bulk said...

Have you been reading?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dice_Man

The Snoring Man said...

I might be better making all decisions with a dice.

The Editor said...

Cures indecision but then it doesn't matter what you decide does it, if it's all predestined?

The Incredible Bulk said...

All predestined, eh?

Well that would make some sense, because I was talking to my trainer tonight (personal trainer, not footwear) and I was telling her about our bet. The one where you said if I managed to lose 10 stones by the end of this year that you would eat a hat. This was overheard by another gym goer who has kindly offered his Ostrich hat for the occassion. He says it's stronger than steel. If I succeed, do you have enough ketchup?

The Editor said...

Re: Hat eating you can eat anything given sufficient time - Salvador Dali ate a wardrobe, I believe.

The Snoring Man said...

I thought that throwing the dice might throw predestiny.

The Editor said...

it's predestined that you will grow old and die, everything else is just the gravy.