THE DAILY ARSE 2nd April

"The degree of purpose engendered by the continuance of this daily diatribe has acted as a substantial bulwark against common or garden negativity, if not existential angst." i remarked casually to Alan Bullerton who was standing in the water at the bottom of the stairs of 185 south street. But his attention appeared to be otherwise focused on the removal of the communal letterbox which has long been an irritation and a security issue for most if not all tenants.
"My work here today concerns Las Cascadas Magicas" I continued, gesturing to the regular dripping from above, alan nodded. I must say I've been very appreciative of Alans talentsts of late, bringing a certain amount of pressure to bear on the more recalcitrant occupants to fit their own individual letterboxes.
This new era will successfully end that abominable practice of mail thievery. Suspicion had been laid at the door of the woman in flat F according to the woman in Flat H. Although judging by the evidence in the bin store below the stairs it could just as easily been any number of passing early morning vagrants ranging from IV users to anyone simply caught short and/or suffering from a sudden bout of nausea.....