1st April. April Fool?

"Excuse me?" said the waitress from behind me in the High Street waving the till receipt, "It actually said Card Declined."
"Oh?" I followed her back into the Restaurant/Gallery like a common criminal. "My wife will be back shortly she has a different card".

Unable to consume any more food or drink I leafed through the complementary copy of the local paper squinting without my Tesco glasses at various court reports. The larger print told of an inept attempt by some guy to make an insurance claim after paying some Hoodies £50 to set fire to his car...

If I could stage my own death the Life Insurance would certainly ease the cash flow. The trouble is, you can't simply disappear, you need a death certificate. These must be easily forged or even downloaded, surely. If they can fake an identity of someone living they can fake the paperwork for being dead?

I see Google has 4,700,000 entries for Faking Your Own Death, so I'm not the first person to have thought of it. The main problem seems to be what happens afterwards, ie. re-emerging into another life, which is on the face of it, remarkably similar to Your Own Death in general.

2 comments:

The Snoring Man said...

I know it would have to be a secret but who or what would you come back as?

The Editor said...

i can tell you one thing, i wouldn't be coming back aa a Chimney Lining person.